Bullet Point Film Review: There Will Be Blood

In 1898, Danny Lewis falls into a deep hole after being frightened by the THX sound.
He finds a bastard in a basket.
He travels around the old West trying to sell towns on his plan to build a monorail.
He meets the suicidal kid from Little Miss Sunshine who tells him about a great place to hunt quail.
He buys up all the quail land and plunders it for extra-virgin olive oil, earning $5,000 per week, or in today’s currency, €25,000 euros.
His basket bastard goes deaf from annoying repetition of the THX sound.
He abandons his child.
He abandons his child.
HE ABANDONS HIS CHILD!
He goes bowling and drinks a milkshake.
There is blood.